the grass is ALWAYS greener.

i guess the only man a girl can count on is her dad.

no one else in this world would have the power to drag me out of bed after my 4-day-long isolation that was accompanied by absolutely no desire to eat, shower or brush my teeth.

and as rough as it is, getting that reality check/slap in the face..sometimes its exactly what you need. and although i know it's been a long, long, long-time coming, you can't actually anticipate the pain until it actually hits you. and i'll tell you now, it killed like a motherfucker. BUT, it was what i was in need of for a very, very loooooong time.

and it's not rocket science. people come in and out of your life when they're supposed to. and you just can't control how or when it happens or for how long certain people are meant to stay, well, because you just can't.

plain and simple.

and maybe i was trying too hard to control something that was ultimately beyond my reach and that's why it became so ridiculously frustrating to deal with and almost impossible to resolve.

or maybe i'm just a slow learner.

whatever the case...although it's almost impossible to make sense of at the time, even that conversation you had with that stranger this morning while desperately trying to get through your cardio session meant something -as insignificant as it may have seemed. and then there are those friends you tend to take for granted, although you should never simply presume that they'll always be there...because they won't. so maybe it's about time that i appreciate the people that are in my life because they are in it now -for however long- and for whatever reason. unfortunately, the fact that my life continued to revolve around you until recently...well, that's a mistake made entirely on my part -and one for which i accept full responsibility. however, as far as my life right now is concerned, your time is up.

the bottom line: boys will be boys.

and there's nothing you can do about it. so i just have to accept it, move on and see where life takes me. because wherever it is, i'm sure as hell its better than here...the other side always is.

p.s. i know it's only been 4 days...but i'm glad to say my hiatus is over. and to be completely honest...it's nice to be back!